this is for you Jaime

Last night I was at a baby shower and the party had began to break up and people we just lingering visiting. A few of my friends wanted to know the status of Jeff's job, Layne's ability to go to private school and just how I was doing. I was doing my best to answer the questions without having to go deep. Vulnerability is not my strong suit, I firmly believe in self preservation at all cost... then it hit. How can I fully express the great things that God has done with out telling just how in dire need I am for Him to come and rescue me!
So, here it goes... I am going to tell you the good, the really good and the thing that scares me the most. I don't want to hide, for I want God to be glorified in and through my life.
About 3 weeks ago ,as you all know, Jeff lost his job. Our hearts were broken, yet hopefully optimistic that this was the Lord allowing us to move back to be near our families. That has not been the case. It has been shown to us over and over again that this is where God would have our family be. There was some disappointment, but also anticipation to see what great things God has in store for our family.
Layne will be going to The Legacy Academy. This was a desire of both Jeff's and my heart, but with the loss of his job and the gaining a new job with less pay we thought that it was out of the question. God was faithful was again. We contacted the school and let them know our situation and waited. Principal Aaron called wrote us back and said they were looking to hire an aide in Layne's class, it would be 2 hour, 5 days a week and if I wanted it the job was mine. Wow, yes I wanted it, that would help out greatly... then came the best news! Doing this would completely cover our tuition bill. Once again I saw God clearly orchestrating His good and perfect will in my family's life.
I mentioned there was something that scares me....well here it goes. Even sitting here trying to write this sentence out I want to through up but I need to tell . I am 10 weeks pregnant.
I am nervous, will I lose this one like I lost Nicholas, will the stress of my life cause any difficulties for my pregnancy. We also found out we don't have insurance and how do we have a baby with no insurance. I am trying every minute of every day to place my faith firmly in the One who holds my tomorrows...easier said than done, but I want at the end of this journey I am on to give praise to God for His faithful provision.

Please be praying for guidance and wisdom, and for God's provision for health insurance.

Thank you for all of those who have supported us through this experience, you are our treasures and gifts from God!

Ps we have not yet told the girls about the upcoming baby yet, so please do not say anything to them... we will tell them once I have been to the Dr and had everything checked.